5 reasons I feel guilty that our kids aren’t in organized team sports (right now):
1. Sports are (generally speaking) good for a kid’s health.
2. What if one of my kids has untapped amazing skill potential in some sport?
3. If you have never played baseball by the time you are, say, 20, people consider you to be odd. Especially boys.
4. There are things you learn being on a sports team that you can’t learn anywhere else.
5. It would be cool to see a kid score a goal or something.
13 reasons I don’t feel guilty that our kids aren’t in sports:
1. Team sports makes regular full family dinner times more difficult or impossible.
2. Especially with a big family.
3. Generally speaking, people glorify God more with academic ability, musical ability or artistic ability than with sports (This is maybe our primary reason).
4. My kids aren’t showing any interest in being in sports.
5. There is a different kind of teamwork learned by being in a musical organization.
6. But I’m leary of the whole teamwork benefit motivation.
7. There is a lot of teamwork involved in being in a large family
8. Sunday games.
9. Sports means less time for church or any number of important things.
10. We are physically active in other ways.
11. The example of many great people who have gone before us and have done much good with their lives despite having never been involved in sports.
12. If our kids are amazing in some sport, most likely they will discover it and use it later in life. Or they won’t and they won’t regret it.
13. My little involvement with sports growing up did not serve to increase my self-esteem.
Thoughts?
11 comments
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January 23, 2009 at 4:10 am
bethyada
1. Girls involved in sports teams have less pre-marital sex.
2. Sunday isn’t a problem, just say no Sunday games (or choose one that doesn’t do Sunday) and when the odd game comes up on Sunday, telling them church comes first is a valuable lesson.
3. People can glorify God with sport: think Liddell, Studd, that soccer player Vox posted about last year.
Not that we do much sport in our family, one daughter does dance. I don’t think it a large issue if people don’t do sport, so no guilt issues; I just think that many of your negatives don’t really exist.
January 23, 2009 at 4:11 am
bethyada
My little involvement with sports growing up did not serve to increase my self-esteem.
Oh, and this may be a good thing! I don’t think self-esteem is particularly valuable.
January 23, 2009 at 7:21 am
Chris
It is good that your reasons to feel guilty are much less than your reasons not to feel guilty:
There are lots of fun things you can do to encourage healthy exercise without being involved in organized sports (which often has a lot of standing/sitting around waiting to play rather than actually playing).
If your child has amazing ability, it will probably be showing up and the child would probably be getting after you to get involved or just playing anyway. Most kids with amazing ability just can’t stop. Kurt Warner, Jerry West and others talk about how they just played and played their sport all the time on their own, with or without friends to play with or an organized team.
“3. If you have never played baseball by the time you are, say, 20, people consider you to be odd. Especially boys.” I wouldn’t worry about this one. People think other people are odd for lots of reasons, most of which are not valid.
“5. It would be cool to see a kid score a goal or something.” Now this one is so true, but you don’t have to be in an “organized sport” to see this. Arrange some fun pick up games and skill building sessions with other families. Organize some intramural activities. You can schedule them so they aren’t at the same time as church. You can also involve the kids fairly and educationally and not have to deal with coaches that swear at your elementary age kids or put in a pinch hitter for your kid only to have the substitute strike out all the the time anyway. I have seen this happen to people. I know our kids have to face adversity in life and learn to deal with things like this, but it doesn’t mean we have to pay for it or sign them up for it.
Blessing to your family!
We hope you post some pics of your fun family backyard sports events:)
January 23, 2009 at 10:19 am
jamsco
“1. Girls involved in sports teams have less pre-marital sex.”
I’d like to see the study behind this. I would guess it’s not the only activity that is a preventer.
“3. People can glorify God with sport: think Liddell, Studd, that soccer player Vox posted about last year.”
Obviously true, but note that I didn’t say it’s impossible. It just happens less.
“I don’t think self-esteem is particularly valuable.”
Neither do I, but it’s sometimes given as a positive for Sports.
January 23, 2009 at 10:21 am
jamsco
“We hope you post some pics of your fun family backyard sports events”
Have you seen this?
http://jamsco.wordpress.com/2008/05/26/three-approaches-to-trampoline-safety/
Okay, it’s not exactly a sports event.
January 23, 2009 at 11:14 am
abigail
I’m wondering what you base #3 on? In the secular world of music, art, and academia, I would say this is not true. Turn on the radio to any station but 98.5 and the evidence abounds. Or go to Walker Institute of Art. Or visit 99% of colleges and grad schools. There are as many Christian sports people glorifying God in the secular world as there are Christians in the secular world glorifying God with their art and academics,etc.
In the Christian world.. I think you’re right, cause there aren’t really “Christian sports” like there is the genre of Christian music. So I guess my question is, when you say “people” glorify God more with music, etc, do you mean in Christian culture or secular culture?
All that said, I don’t think you should feel guilty. You’re doing an awesome job with your kids. You care about their souls. You’re a great example to us all.
January 23, 2009 at 1:22 pm
Chris
Yes, I do remember the trampoline pics–delightful:)
January 23, 2009 at 2:33 pm
Amy
Didn’t we have a great time last summer, playing that casual game of kickball with our kids, after our picnic? No regrets on our part!
January 23, 2009 at 2:59 pm
Andy Gammons
As a dad of three boys, one of whom is really getting interested in sports (Ben), I am very interested in your post. We have not done any sports so far. Our oldest is only six, but many families have been doing sports for three years by this time. I do think boys need a lot of male interaction that is around active pursuits. Sports is the traditional way that this took place, but certainly not the only. There are things like, outside work, camping, hiking, and of course unorganized or disorganized sport. I have seen my boys light up when we are active together, working towards a common goal.
Another reason that I am leary of kids organized sports is the coaches. Growing up I had many coaches that were not good influences. The idea of dropping my kids off with an adult that I don’t know very well to influence them for hours at a time does not sound like a good idea.
I am sure that you are doing this, but there are lots of ways to “play” with your kids, boys especially. This kind of play leads to so many teachable moments.
January 23, 2009 at 11:55 pm
jamsco
I guess what I’m trying to say with sports and glorifying God is that every church needs 10 to 15 (or 50?) skilled musicians. They all need people academically trained. Many need artists (graphic, photographic) and people skilled in drama. But almost none need sports people.
So I am not seeing that more musicians (or whoever) glorify God than sports people. I’m saying a person will find more venues for glorifying God if they have skills in music, than if they have skills in sports.
Does that make sense?
January 24, 2009 at 4:08 pm
abigail
Yeah, that makes sense. I’m not really a big sports person or anything… I guess I went the music route. I just know some families who go the “sports” route and use it as a teaching tool for godliness with their children…
I suppose, if you belong to Christ’s body, you will glorify God the best in the area He intends (has gifted) you to do so. May be sports, or music, etc. So the venues might not be as broad in sports, but it’s kind of irrelevant for a particular person with particular giftings.