Friday Everything: Greg Harris

I was going through some file and I found something I typed up from my Men’s Retreat notes (from the fall of 2007 – yes, a year and a half ago). I thought it good enough to report here.

12 Funny Quotes From Greg Harris’s Teachings At Bethlehem’s Men’s Retreat

1. There’s a detail that’s overlooked by the hippies: We’re not birds. – regarding “Consider the birds of the air”

2. If you miss the springboard, you still end up in the water.

3. If you were a toaster, it would feel good to make toast.

4. Whoah! I feel a miracle comin’ on! – What a tele-evangelist would say in the Elijah/widow story

5. You always see the scene “Bring some hot water!”

6 . . And then the string is going ‘You’ve got children.’ – regarding what is keeping the Kite from flying away and what keeps the kite up.

7. Many wives feel like the bruised shins of a blind man.

8. . . . Now Joshua writes a book – with a bad title! – and it sells a million copies.

9. Nobody watches the launching pad after the rocket goes off.

10. You get to clear your throat a lot in Hebrew.

11. Some of you are thinking – where’s the action? Does anything get blown up? Well, there’s a crime scene. And there is a fire! – regarding the movie – ‘Avalon’

12. For lightbulbs, that would be the epitome of light-making – to be in the dining room.

Or if you like, my original Friday Everything Format

Everything I Ever Needed To Know I Learned From Greg Harris

 There’s a detail that’s overlooked by the hippies: We’re not birds. *** If you miss the springboard, you still end up in the water. *** If you were a toaster, it would feel good to make toast. *** Whoah! I feel a miracle comin’ on! *** You always see the scene “Bring some hot water!” *** . . . And then the string is going ‘You’ve got children.’ *** Many wives feel like the bruised shins of a blind man. ***  Joshua writes a book – with a bad title! – and it sells a million copies. *** Nobody watches the launching pad after the rocket goes off. *** You get to clear your throat a lot in Hebrew. *** Some of you are thinking – where’s the action? Does anything get blown up? Well, there’s a crime scene. And there is a fire! *** For lightbulbs, that would be the epitome of light-making – to be in the dining room.